Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved the beauty in black horses. I remember feeling a special connection as a kid when I read a book about a rebel black horse.
I have known for a long time there would come a time in my spiritual journey where I would have to make very painful decisions in order to stay the path I’m on. I have had to do this a few times. And if I didn’t have the courage to, I paid for it later.
When a situation arose that I needed to seriously evaluate, a did my best to situate myself to meditate.
I quieted my mind and in the time of less then a second, I was on the back of a black horse, holding on for dear life. I remember how shiny the black fur was. I was fascinated by black horses as a child. Funny, as I ask for spiritual assistance, it shows up to help me now. Black Horse, an animal signifying movement and change, is also a Spirit Animal that carries you into the darkness of the Void.
Together we journeyed through a wormhole of some kind… it was dark and silent with occasional lightning casting off a short lived deep violet glow. Lightning I know means big energy, and to me, it’s a message of massive change coming down from the Heavens. Lightning is a "calling card" of sorts for me. It puts me on notice as if to say “We’re watching”. (Gulp). I know this means there is a spiritual lesson at play.
I hear familiar voices and laughter off in the distance. I try to get to them, but I feel like they are getting further and further away. An image appears before me. I see the people in question in this image, but the images are out of focus and blurry. I try harder and harder to get to them. I look around and I realize I am under water and the water is a murky grayish green (a symbol of needed emotional healing). I see them in front of me, drifting away, and I stretch my arm out desperately trying to reach for them. I try to swim hard, but something is not allowing me to move towards them. I try to grasp onto a piece of them. I feel resistance, something holding me in place. A voice tells me “You have to let them go”. “Let them go”.
My heart breaks as I watch them drift away, the image turning into a faded old photograph, decaying into pieces in the water, signifying what I thought I had was no more than tattered dreams. Tears fall from my eyes as I fully understand what this means.
In life we are to make big decisions as a part of our growth. These big decisions are hard and can cause us to question everything. Its painful when the illusion you held in place comes to light and you see the truth of things. There is sorrow in that.
Doing what is right for you may not sit well with some and may hurt others.
The reason big choices that are in your best and highest good are so hard is because they are tests of sorts… testing Soul lessons and our ability to love ourselves.
One of the toughest lessons in life is to confront something. It takes great courage to do so, as, in that moment, every single one of our fears and insecurities renders us vulnerable. Do you have the courage to take an active role, step into your authentic self and speak your truth and choose what is best for you and your heart and spirit?
Or do you acquiesce, making up a million reasons to leave it alone to avoid confrontation or communicating about it? To suppress it is literally holding others in suppression too. What you do for you radiates out into the Cosmos. Wouldn’t you rather place the energy of empowerment and out into the Universe? Wouldn’t you rather choose you and love you? We are not here to be scapegoats. We must love ourselves as much as we love others… not see ourselves as less than.
In life, choices and decisions must be made, and those choices should be made for what is in your best and highest good. It will not be comfortable, and it may even be painful, but it’s important to put the love of self and one’s own wellbeing first.
Choosing what is right for you may be hard.
You may be sad after making the choice that is in your best and highest good. Being sad doesn’t mean that it’s wrong. Allow yourself to grieve if you need to.
To release something does not mean to stop loving it, but as I like to say, you can choose to love from afar instead.
Don’t let anything or anyone chip away at your Light.
Always choose you.
It’s not selfish… it’s essential.
( I am not sure who needed to see this, but I hope it helps you)
Rebecca Costello, Psychic Medium
Dancing Elk Shamanic Healing